I'm watching the Olympic opening ceremonies now. I have a disdain for both Matt Lauer and Katie Couric, and it's unfortunate that I'm unable to mute the TV volume and instead tune a radio to a station that features better announcers, like I'm able to do for Packers football games. (For those of you that don't know, I'd say that probably 1/3 of Wisconsin does that).

During the parade of atheletes, Lauer and Couric built up to the announcement of the United States athletes, keeping us advised when they were 10 away, when they were 5 away, when they were two away.

When the United States was about to be announced, Lauer said "and here comes the reaction to the US team....."

I thought, "hey, this should be great." And it was. The US had, by FAR, the most positive response. I was proud of my country, and I was proud to see that the world community viewed them so favorably.

But that audio feed that made me so happy and proud immediately started to piss me off, as Matt Lauer started babbling something about how the Greeks really hate the US, and that they draw a distinction between the US government and the US people, and something about the US supporting a dictatorship there in Greece years ago, I don't know what he was saying. I didn't know why he was saying it. It made no sense, wasn't in context. He was rambling and babbling.

Then it struck me - he wasn't "building up" to the announcement of the US team because he thought it'd be a great moment - he was building up because he thought that the announcement of USA would be met with boos and catcalls. That dipshit was excited for what he thought would be a hugely negative reaction. He had this canned response all ready - when the arena wildly booed the US, he was going to say "there is the world reaction to iraq..., (insinuate that people should vote against bush)...." then add "the greek people also dont like the US because of a 40 year old policy...." as an attempt to look impartial! As an attempt to look like he was searching for all possible solutions!

BUT IT WASN'T a negative reaction. It was the most positive reaction that you could imagine. And Matt Lauer didn't know what to do or what to say. He launched into panic mode, and started babbling so much that no one knew what the hell he was talking about. He managed to fumble, fumble, fumble, then get in his pre-planned part about the 40-year old history. He was talking louder and faster the whole time, he completely lost his composure. I was only thinking, "WHEN WILL HE STOP TALKING?!?" I was left wondering, "WHERE are Jim Irwin and Max McGee?"