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  • Top Ten Things John Tant Is Afraid To Write About

       April 20, 2005

    Well, based on an email I received which launched the previous post, I thought I'd clarify what I'm actually too scared to write about:


    10: The constitutionality of the income tax and how it relates to the 16th amendment, because I'm an accountant and former government employee and am therefore in on the conspiracy to fleece the American people with an illegal tax.

    9: The shortcomings I've experienced with Windows-based machines, because to do so would be to endorse the superiority of the Macintosh.

    8: The many people of the Islam faith who have not engaged in terrorist attacks, because it would damage the Republican talking point that Islam is evil.

    7: Anything to do with Catholicism since it would expose the rank hypocrisy of Holy Mother Church and my willingness to go along with it.

    6: Any suggestion that legalizing drugs will lead to more drug use, because that's just stupid dinosaur-type thinking.

    5: Penguins.

    4: A point by point rebuttal of the Brady Campaign's talking points, since they are so on target that doing so would expose me as an idiotic gun nut.

    3: Homosexuality, homosexuality, homosexuality!

    2: Treating every liberal-hyped scandal du jour with the seriousness it supposedly deserves, because doing so would be to acknowledge these very serious charges which are, of course, only grounded in principle and not partisan spite.

    And the topic which scares me like no other:

    1: Revising my list of five...because I like my house too much.


    Posted by John Tant at April 20, 2005 01:59 PM

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    Comments

    #  April 20th, 2005 10:30 PM      david
    we love this confrontational shit!  
     
    #  April 22nd, 2005 8:34 AM      BrianH
    Well John,

    It's time to get over your fear of the penguin issues!

    WGN news last night had a story about a penguin who was forced to become a single mother because the young father refused to provide child support!

    It's about time we do something about those dead beat dad penguins!
     
     
    #  April 24th, 2005 11:03 AM      mbrlr
    As far as Holy Mother Church goes, many of us within her are about to bolt to Orthodoxy. Perhaps they've been right about the papacy the last 1000 years or so, and there always has been that nasty bit about the filioque clause  
     

     

     


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