May 10, 2005

American Idol Recap - Week 9. Who's gonna get voted off?

Seacrest in, wearing an ugly printed shirt under his blazer. Man, who dresses this guy? "In 2 weeks we'll be at the Kodak Theater for the finale."

du-nuh-na-uh-nah-na-nuh-na-nuh-nuh-nuh.

Lots of shock and outrage surrounding the show, says Seacrest. That's what happens when you lose a guy like Scott Savol. Laughs from the judges as Randy and Simon both point at Paula for some reason.

Switch to the flashback shot of Seacrest telling the contestants what the theme will be. He has a really big cutout of the United States which he holds up as he trumpets, "THIS............. is the United States!" Apparently they don't expect the constants on this show to have finished first grade geography. Or maybe they just figured that Bo killed the particular brain cells that contained that little tidbit. Or hey, maybe Scotty was the brains of the group. "yea, dog, ya kno' wha' im say'un, that BEEEE the U.S. of A, ahey, where's my pot pie, beeeatch!" Who knows.

We're told that half of the songs this week are "the Philly sound," written by Gamble and Huff, and that the other half are from Nashville and are country tunes. So it's a little bit country, and a little bit rock and roll. Ok, if Donnie and Marie are in the audience I'm gonna quit watching forever. In any event, you surely don't need a map of the whole entire US of A to show those 2 cities, seeing as how you can drive from one to the other by passing through only 2 other states, but what the heck, I guess "Middle Atlantic Idol" just doesn't have a good ring to it.

This week it looks like each song will be introduced by members of the contestants' families.

Carrie's 2 sisters Shanna and Stephanie come out to introduce Carrie doing "Sin Wagon" by the Dixie Chicks (who are from Texas, not Nashville.) Suffice it to say, Carrie got the looks in that family. Hey, maybe they got the book smarts or something. "Oklahoma's pulling for you!" ha. I don't know if I just don't like this song or if I just dont like Carrie's performance. I don't think I like either. This is a terrible song for Idol - it's like a bluegrass beat with about 20 instruments in it. It sounds like a bunch of racket.
Randy: That was the perfect song.
Paula: Randy said it all.
Simon: Wise words, Paula. "very very very good indeed."
Hat: Of all of the good country songs to choose from, you pick that crap? That was awful, Carrie. Simply awful. You might be going home this week, hon.

Bo Bice's parents introduce him doing Travis Tritt's "It's a Great Day to Be Alive." I'll tell you right now before even hearing it, that's an awesome song choice perfect for Bo. Hmmm, I'm a little disappointed in his subdued performance, but his voice sounds great.

Randy: Great job, I didn't like the song.
Paula: Babble Babble. (she's so nervous, I'll bet she's sleeping with him.)
Simon: Starts out, "What Paula was trying to say, is that was boring."
Hat: I liked the choice, but agree, it was boring. It could have been done much more upbeat. Next time take in a few lines before the performance to bring out some energy.

Vonzell's brothers Gabriel and Kendall introducing her as she does some Trisha Yearwood, "How do I live Without you?" Huh, I was about to complement one of them on his hair, but he just punked out by threatening Simon, cautioning him to "watch it." Just what we need, more entourage punks in the music biz. The song sounds fine, until Vonzell messes up the words noticeably. Nothing really bad about this performance except that, but nothing really great either.

Randy: This song is too slow for me. (OK there, Mr. Journey.)
Paula: "You are a beautiful performer." She says this 3 or 4 times. (You know what's too slow for me? Sober Paula. I can't take it anymore.)
Simon: You looked and sounded incredibly nervous.
Hat: It's not secret that I don't like Vonzell. I think she's boring and cookie cutter. There is just no star-quality. I don't know why Vonzell is crying now, apparently something happened to her in the off-week, but we're not told what it is.

Natalia and Vladimir, Federov's parents, introducing the "Ukranian cowboy" himself doing a song by Lonestar. They're not introducing any of these songs by name, btw - I'm including the titles b/c I happen to know them. This song is called "I'm already there." It's certainly a Federov-styled song, a sort of rockin' ballad that he can kick out. I have to say, I'm not a big fan of this style of song, but I am impressed with his performance.

Randy: I've gotta give you props, it was good dog.
Paula: Good performance.
Simon: You sang well, but that felt a bit "cynical" and "gooey."
Hat: Goo or no goo, I thought this was the Ukranian Cowboy's best week, by far.

Gamble and Huff are in the audience introducing their little segement. Thank god, no Osmonds are shown.

Carrie comes out to introduce her song, "If you don't know me" while crying about how much she likes her sisters. Oh give me a break. I don't think I could spend more than a few days in the same house with Carrie. Anyway, the performance is OK, but I have to say - I'm not that impressed. She sounds punchy or "up and down." I'm actually cringing at some of the notes. But the audience is cheering? I don't know what they're hearing there, but this isn't in tune.

Randy: Didn't work for me tonight. (big boos from the audience.) Pitch-wise, he says, that wasn't on. (Good, I'm glad I'm not the only one.)
Paula: Didn't work for you.
Simon: That was an appalling arrangement, it was boring, it was a complete and utter mess.
Hat: I agree with the judges. At the outset of this competition, I was really impressed with Carrie. Not anymore - the last 4 weeks she's been decidedly ordinary. And like I said, that was waaaaay out of tune.

Bo up with "For the love of money," made famous by the OJ's, and made even more famous by Donald Trump and The Apprentice. I think this is a good choice for Bo, and he doesn't disappoint. Much more energy this time out.

Randy: "I hope when your record comes out, that's on your record."
Paula: "Your best performance so far, loved it."
Simon: "Terrible image, fantastic performance."
Hat: I wouldn't call it his best, but it was pretty good.

Vonzell is singing "Don't leave me this way," and she dedicates the song to her parents for "all of their hard work, often working 2 or 3 songs to support them." OK, that dedication makes no sense to me, but whatever. V likes her parents, I'll just figure she meant that. OK, she is hitting some notes here that have a very Diana Ross sound about them. I actually have goosebumps - this is easily her best performance EVER.

Randy: "The one thing America knows now, you can definitely sing."
Paula: Says it was her personal best.
Simon: You pulled all the stops out on that one, it was a very manic performance. Better than your first.
Hat: I don't know where this has been all season. If she had belted it out like this, I would have never hated her.

Federov with a message for his parents, "Thanks for giving me the American Dream." Awwww. Whoa, crappy crappy crappy song choice of "If you don't know me by now." Pretty crappy version of it, too.

Randy: Dude, that was good, you worked it out.
Paula: You nailed it.
Simon: The problem I have with that is that you need soul to sing that song, it came over like trying to get the Woody Allen to play the leading (something).
Hat: I thought that was terrible. His first song was great, the last was terrible.

(Visit our American Idol category page for previous recaps and other stories.)

Ok, based on JUST tonight's perfomances, here is my rating:

1. Bo Bice
2. Vonzell
3. Federov
4. Carrie

As we all know, though, Idol voting isn't entirely based on the best perfomance. For that reason, I predict that Federov will be voted off.

Posted by jkhat at May 10, 2005 08:02 PM

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