Top Ten Green Bay Packers Gameday Promotions
While watching the Packers game last night, I noticed that one of the loudest cheers from the fans came when the TV cameras lingered on former Packer (and Bear and Viking) Jim McMahon. McMahon must be pushing 50, but he's still the "punky QB" with his pierced ear and glorious fur coat. Of course, what made the crowd cheer even louder was something that the TV announcers missed: The "Majik Man", Don Majikowski was standing right next to McMahon. It's a sad thing when the site of former players is the highlight of the night. But, that's the way it goes when you're 2-8 and on your way down.
It's a rough year for Packer fans, but with a little bit of creativity, I think the team can salvage the season. They may not win any more games, but they can at least make the losses more entertaining for the fans. With that in mind, I present:
My Top Ten Green Bay Packers Gameday Promotions
10. Washed-Up Quarterback Night: Packers "legends" like T.J. Rubley, David Whitehurst, Rich Campbell & Randy Wright compete in a Quarterback Toss at halftime. The winner gets a signing bonus and a clipboard.
9. You Be The Coach Day: The Packers could win a lot of points with their fans by firing coach Mike Sherman now, rather than waiting until the end of the year. Rather than hiring an interim coach, the fans could determine the plays through the end of the year. Using a sophisticated "applause-o-meter", the fans' intent to run or pass, punt or go for it will be determined and implemented. It'll be a dream come true for every armchair coach who thinks he has what it takes to head up an NFL franchise.
8. Historical Re-enactments: At every remaining home game, the current Packers will re-enact a glorious moment from the team's past. Moments will include Bart Starr's quarterback sneak in the Ice Bowl, Chester Marcol's touchdown run off of a blocked field goal against the Bears, Don Majikowski's touchdown pass in the Instant Replay Game* and Dorsey Levens rushing through a "hole big enough to drive a truck to the Super Bowl through" in the 1995 NFC Championship game against Dallas.
7. 1/2 Price Beer Day: 'nuff said.
6. Let a hockey game break out.
5. Reggie Bush Welcome Days: Word on the street is that USC's great running back would prefer to play for a warm weather or major market team. Sadly, Green Bay is neither, but that doesn't mean the team won't try to convince Bush that Green Bay is just the place for him. During the Packers last two nationally televised home games (against Chicago & Seattle) Lambeau Field will be turned from a Frozen Tundra into a tropical paradise. Giant inflatable palm trees will be strategically placed around the stadium, fans will be given free leis as they file into the stadium. Additionally, those fans sitting in the top row of Lambeau Field will be asked to hold up signs simulating a new, skyscraper-filled Green Bay skyline.
4. Pick the Kicker Contests: Lost in all of the Packers other problems is the fact that kicker Ryan Longwell (aka "Shortbad") sucks. With the amount of money he makes, I'm deathly afraid that the Packers will consider drafting a new kicker next spring. To avoid that type of catastrophe, I think the team should find a new kicker now and add some fan excitement. Before every game, one lucky ticketholder will be randomly chosen to be the placekicker for the day. Some will stink, but you never know when you'll find a diamond in the rough.
3. Bat Day: Stealing a page from the Milwaukee Brewers promotional handbook, the first 15,000 fans into Lambeau Field will receive a commemorative bat. Special attention should be paid in order that "Bat Day" does not coincide with "1/2 Price Beer Day". However, there should be no problems if Bat Day just happens to coincide with the Packers/Bears game.
2. Pack Rap Attack Revival & Halftime Show: Back in the mid 80s, the Packers sucked and the Bears were a playoff team. To counter the Bears' now classic "Super Bowl Shuffle", some enterprising Packer fans wrote their own rap song to gently poke fun at their Packers. Well folks, I think it's time for a Pack Rap revival. With Fox as a partner, the Packers would hold a nationwide contest to create a new song. Each week, pretenders to the throne would be voted off by the football viewing audience, a la American Idol. The winning group would get to perform their song at halftime of the Packers' New Years Day game against the Seahawks.
1. Ice Cream!: If the Packer defense gives up five or less touchdowns in any game, every fan with a ticket stub will be entitled to a free Culvers ice cream cone. Nothing motivates people like the potential for ice cream.
*Upon further review, the Bears still suck
Posted by at November 22, 2005 07:44 AM
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|# November 22nd, 2005 4:55 PM Ghost_Of_Your_Father|
|What the hell do you mean, Kris, calling Randy Wright a washed-up quarterback? The Packers never gave him a chance. He played behind the worst offensive line in the history of football with no running back. He'd have to be able to release the ball in 1.5 seconds to have a chance to complete a pass! So you lay off Randy. He was a better quarterback than 3/4th of those goddamned losers I watched for 60 years. |
|# November 22nd, 2005 4:58 PM BVBigBro|
|She meant Anthony Dilweg. |
|# November 22nd, 2005 5:01 PM BVBigBro|
|And Randy Wright had both Brent Fullwood and Paul Ott Carruth to hand the ball to. |