American Idol Recap-The Final Five Perform
Tonight the final five will perform two songs: one from the year they were born and one from the top ten of any of this week's Billboard charts. Let's get it on!
Elliott sings George Benson's "Broadway" (1978). Elliott's right arm is going crazy, it's distracting. Stop it, Elliott's right arm! As for the rest of Elliott, the vibrato is in full force and this is his typical performance of a song that has all kinds of twists and turns that never goes anywhere. It's boring. Randy & Paula like it, but Simon thinks he's lucky he has another performance tonight. So do I. A 5.
Paris is going to sing "Kiss" by Prince (1988). Really? Oh wow. This could be incredible. Hopefully incredibly good, like the Tom Jones version. She changes "girl" to "boy" in the song, which is just lame. But other than that, she's really a little fantastic. She rocks out at the end of the song. I love her. Randy & Paula damn her with faint praise. Paula actually complains that she's not singing old songs. Hey, the damn show is making her sing a song from 1988 you drunken fool. Simon thought it was "screechy & annoying". Simon is either trying to sacrifice Paris to Katharine OR he's trying to scare her fanbase. I'm giving Paris a 9. Go, Paris, Go!
Chris sings 1979's "Renegade". Chris gets backup singers. He's got a bit more of the goat throat tonight, but it's still pretty good. I know Chris is getting pimped to death by the show, but he really is good. He wouldn't be an undeserving winner. Randy loves him. Paula loves him. Simon really, really loves him. I still like Paris better, so I'm giving Chris an 7.
Ryan tastelessly brings up Katharine's wardrobe malfunction last week. Kat assures us she's strapped in this week as she steps up to sing "Against All Odds" (1984). She starts with a terrible first note. Wow, I used to play this song on my flute and I was about 1,000 times better than Kat. She's off key or flat or pitchy or something. Whatever it is, it ain't good. This is a Pickleresque performance. The best Randy can sing is that it was "okay". Both Randy & Paula compliment her outfit. That's not a good sign. I think it was just terrible. I give her a 2.
Word up, Soul Patrol. Their man, Taylor, hits the stage to sing 1976's "Play That Funky Music, White Boy". Oh yeah, bring that Wild Cherry! I think this song is Taylor's f*ck you to the Idol producers. He's singing it defiantly, which adds a whole new dimension to the song. I really like it and so does the crowd. Randy & Paula like it, but Simon has no clue what to make of it. He thinks it's a "horrible wedding performance". No, that's not horrible. The woman who karaoked "Baby Got Back" at the wedding I was at last summer was horrible. This was actually pretty great. I'm giving it an 8.
We're halfway through and I'd just like to compliment Paris, Taylor and Chris for choosing entertaining songs. It's about frickin' time. It's also time for the annual American Idol CD. Pre-order yours now. How do you like that commercial break?
Elliott's back to sing Michael Buble's "Home". I don't like Michael Buble. He's too showy. I kind of like Elliott's more heartfelt take on the song. But should he really be singing a song about "coming back home" now? He's really tempting us to vote him off the show, isn't he? The judges like this one better and so do I, but Simon is a little worried about him. So am I. I'm going to give him an 8, but he needed a 9.
Cute little Paris is going to sing Mary J. Blige's "Be Without You". I can't understand a word that she's singing, which ticks me off. However, I absolutely adore her ultra-cool silver and camo outfit. God, I sound like Paula. I don't get this song at all, but Paris is really awesome. She has suddenly figured out how to convey the emotion of a song. "Princess P" gets an 9.
Chris performs "I Dare You". I've never heard of this song. It's so "Chris" that it might as well be on his first CD. Chris is as good as ever, but I've just realized that hearing two Chris songs in an hour is one Chris song too many. I'm already bored with him. The judges didn't really like it either and they think his voice is going to go out on him. Maybe that wouldn't be a bad thing. It's just a 5.
Chris' partner in pimp, Katharine sings K.T. Tunstall's "Black Horse & Cherry Tree". She sings the whole song on her knees (once again, how Pickleresque) and while that's a nice novelty, wtf? Her second performance is better than her first, but I still don't know what to make of Katharine. Is she a barefoot hippie or a siren song diva? I'd be more interested in her if she's the former. In any case, it's a 7.
Closing out the show, it's Vote For The Worst's Taylor. Taylor cheats and sings "Something" from the Beatles (it's on some obscure "catalog" Billboard chart). This might be my favorite Beatle song, as I'm partial to the gooey, schmaltzy George Harrison songs. Taylor's version is more like a Joe Cocker cover, which just strips all the romance out of it. I absolutely hate it. Objectively, it's probably not that bad, but he just ruined one of my all-time favorites. Jerk. The judges kind of like it. I don't. It's a 3.
My cumulative rankings for the evening:
My guess is that Paris goes tomorrow anyway.
Posted by at May 2, 2006 07:57 PM
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|# May 2nd, 2006 8:11 PM cherlynda|
|You know I really like Chris..but I hated that Styx song. I have always thought it sucked. ANd I dont mind Katherine at all. She did mess with against all odds cause that is a very good emotional song..it didnt need all that vocal dressing up. She could have stood there and just sang it. I just think she seems like a nice person. BUt every week I like Elliot more and more...reminds me of Randy Ellie. |
|# May 2nd, 2006 8:25 PM BVBigBro|
|Chris sucked. The fact that the judges want him to advance doesn't improve what were two lame performances of two lame songs.
Paris mailed it in. Kiss was awful; the second song was more her style and was a big improvement even though she screwed up some notes. I predict she leaves tomorrow.
Elliot's On Broadway was karaoke at its' worst. His second song saved him.
Taylor wasn't too bad. It's impossible to screw up Something, and Play That Funky Music was perfectly timed to come right after two boring performances.
Kat did half of Against All Odds at a different speed than the backup band, but finished it strong. I thought her second song was the best performance of the night, even if it was sort of weird.
Idol has got to stop doing these crappy themes. Let the people sing something they (and we) like and they might be good at.
|# May 2nd, 2006 8:29 PM kris|
|If I was singing a song from the year I was born, I would choose either Gordon Lightfoot's "If You Could Read My Mind" or Paul McCartney's "Admiral Halsey". I'd just want to do this part:
live a little
be a gypsy
get your feet up off the ground
live a little
|# May 2nd, 2006 8:30 PM james|
|couldnt disagree with you more this week, kris.
- paris was godawful atrocious
- (paula was only joking about the older songs, in reference to something simon said about her sining only old songs, btw)
- elliott couldn't be any more boring, and was average at best. i'd give him a 6 at most.
- taylor was the best
- renegade rocked
- there was nothing classless about brining up the wardrobe malfunction, seeing as how that is all anyone is talking about from last week's show
this show is so boring without pickler to rip on!
|# May 2nd, 2006 8:48 PM BVBigBro|
|If I could sing any song from the year you were born it would be Signs - Five Man electrical Band or I'd Love to Change the World - Ten Years After.
Come to think of it, I'd Love to Change the World would be a great song for Chris to do if he would give up that constant vibato he now signs with.
|# May 2nd, 2006 8:49 PM kris|
|What about from the year YOU were born? Why would you sing a song from the year I was born?? |
|# May 2nd, 2006 8:54 PM BVBigBro|
|I was born in the greatest year in musical history. You could pick songs at random and chances are you'd be OK |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:01 PM james|
|we've been over this in previous years. no way i wouldn't do rhinestone cowboy. |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:02 PM BVBigBro|
|Sunshine Superman. |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:04 PM kris|
|yeah James, you were definitely born to do Rhinestone Cowboy |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:10 PM james|
|i dunno what year it was from, but sunset superman is a brazillian times better.
ooh, i feel some downloading coming on...
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:17 PM kris|
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:22 PM james|
|no, i meant sunset superman. 1987. |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:24 PM kris|
|yeah, the Donovan version is from 1966. I don't know the song at all. |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:33 PM james|
|you dont know the donovan version? im sure you do. as far as the dio version, no, you probably havent heard of it, unless you spent your high school years listening to heavy metal while sporting a mullet, like some of us. not to name any names. ;)
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:38 PM kris|
|i've actually never even heard of Dio
good for you for admitting to a mullet. i'm sure everyone where you are from had one. hopefully you had a good, fluffy hockey player mullet and not a greasy, stringy one
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:43 PM james|
|youve never heard of DIO?! who hasn't heard of DIO?!?
i'm almost afraid to ask, but have you heard of black sabbath? they had a few hits, back in the day...
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:46 PM kris|
|don't be ridiculous |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:48 PM james|
|for your reading pleasure
from his band timeline, you may notice:
# Black Sabbath (1979-1983; 1991-1992)
# Dio (1982-1991, 1993-present)
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:51 PM BVBigBro|
|You can be forgiven for not knowing Dio. He was with Sabbath after they were good. |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:52 PM kris|
|i think i can be forgiven just because i was never a mullet-wearing teenage boy |
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:53 PM james|
|hmm, sirius' outlaw country is playing "fancy" by _bobbie gentry_... i had no idea that reba's version was a remake. guess pickler butchered a classic.
|# May 2nd, 2006 9:54 PM james|
|"Sabbath after they were good"
sadly, that covers like 80% of the band's existence... heh.
|# May 2nd, 2006 10:10 PM BVBigBro|
|There's a lot of bands like that. The Rolling Stones for one. |
|# May 3rd, 2006 7:31 AM jagorham|
|Gee, a song from the year I was born... guess I'd have to sing a Bach cantata?
(Seriously, I'd probably sing "Nel Blu Dipinto di Blu," aka "Volare". Which brings up a grand concept for an Idols theme: Foreign language songs. Watch them mangle "O Sole Mio" and "Sukiyaki," or maybe an ABBA tune in Swedish.)
Obtuse observation: didn't the last contestant that performed barefoot (Mandesa) get promptly voted out? Might be bad news for Katherine.
And as for Taylor singing "Something," at least he didn't do it the way Isaac Hayes did in "The Issac Hayes Movement" album! Too bad they can't/won't do a Beatles night - might be rights fees issues in the way ("Something" was written by Harrison, so that might not be in the same copyright boat as most of the band's tunes.)